I think there are many factors at play, not just his sexuality. Our sex is generally not involving any type of gay stuff. -yet you say it is infrequent
I’m sure he is working through things, his attraction to men and why he has it - because he’s gay
The bottom line is that right now in this present moment, he wants to be in this marriage and with me - many of us hear this but they are messing around online or in real life too
We keep talking and talking and talking. He doesn’t want to be a woman - I heard exactly the same yet there was a whole female persona on the internet advertising for men (ok cds, still men)
he doesn’t want to be with men, he wants to be with me and I want to be with him. - he doesn’t want to be with men because he doesn’t want to be gay. But not wanting to be gay doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to be with men. Just that he’s not happy with that want. Still he is what he is as unhappy as he is about it.
I don’t know why it’s so awful that I’m ok with his feelings? - if you are ok with his gay feelings what can we help you with, I’m not sure how we can support you?
Now if he suddenly decides he has to go live some gay life, we will hopefully have continued talking about that and it won’t be some big sneaky surprise. I’m ok with all his feelings as long as he’s not trying to hide shit - I’m afraid I bet he is hiding a lot
and as long as my feelings and my goals and desires in life are part of the equation. - do you feel they are, truly?
Maybe stuff I posted earlier wasn’t fair to him, maybe I read things into what was going on because we had other issues or because at the time he was holding back on telling me how he was feeling about things and it made this huge gap in our relationship. When we are talking and being open and honest everything is different and things are pretty good.- they are good at this
Right now we are in a good place - again, how can this site help?