OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / Tedtalks on the topic of being straight in a Mixed Orientation r'ship

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** July 11, 2017 10:32 pm

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Last edited by Ellexoh_nz (May 17, 2018 2:20 pm)

**Posted by Duped** July 15, 2017 2:47 pm

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Last edited by Duped (November 11, 2019 3:20 pm)

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** July 15, 2017 3:03 pm

Duped wrote:
I watched it. .

I'll make a decision when I'm absolutely sure it's the right one for me.
One thing my man did say, when I asked him "do you trust me?" and he said "what?...not trusting you
doesn't even factor in how I feel about this"
And I said "BINGO!!! (I just about blew trumpets!!!)....THAT...is how I USED TO FEEL about you"

**Posted by Duped** July 16, 2017 5:06 am

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Last edited by Duped (November 11, 2019 3:19 pm)

**Posted by Kel** July 16, 2017 2:29 pm

TED Talks are short - you can only cover so much during a talk (especially when you talk as slowly as this speaker). That being said, I don't think she really imparted much wisdom. She didn't touch on the betrayal, the confusion, the anger, or the fear. She didn't distinguish between regular cheating or a gay spouse situation. She didn't say how to find others in similar situations, despite saying how low the number of us is. And she explained how it's important to have a strong sense of self, but gave no ideas of how to do that. I found it authentic, but utterly unhelpful.

Kel

Last edited by Kel (July 16, 2017 2:29 pm)

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** July 16, 2017 4:11 pm

Kel wrote:
TED Talks are short - you can only cover so much during a talk (especially when you talk as slowly as this speaker).

I found her quiet manner and measured speech far easier to listen to that somebody on stage to make an impact
by loudly proclaiming their position. It actually made me go looking for articles & websites she's linked with. So
really..there's an impetus there to encourage others to research, delve into....learn...and not have everything handed
to them in one big "here you go, this is what you need to do......go do it"

I felt her pain. I've realised this will be a journey of steps, not a quick jump to "a new me",
and I may have to feel every ache, each gut-wrenching torment on the way to deciding what
will be.....

**Posted by iamthelorax** July 29, 2017 7:01 pm

"you are not alone". I saw this video before finding this board. Those are the words that convinced me someone out there knew what I was going through and sure enough, I found this board. Best message ever.