Hi Josephine,
My former spouse came out to me after 2 years of marriage. My divorce will be finalized for 2 years soon. I just started to date again. I've spent a lot of time in therapy to help me heal and rebuild myself again. It has been a beautiful process.
I call "him" my former husband or former spouse. I personally don't like "ex-husband." It sounds raw to me. I like former spouse the best because let's be honest, he wasn't a good husband.
To answer your question about telling a new man ....that I'm currently navigating myself! I feel you will know when YOU feel comfortable to share. This doesn't define who you are as a person, it was a phase/part of your life but not your whole life.. It is now in the past. I find it helpful to concentrate on the current moment. Maybe go out on a few dates and see if you even have a connection. I feel there's no timeline honestly. If you feel the timing is right, trust yourself to share. If not, that's ok. You don't have to spill the beans the first time you meet a stranger from a dating app.
Also, just be upfront. If you feel you need to tell this new person, tell him. If he is not accepting, he's not for you.
I hope this can help you!