OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / HIV, now Monkeypox

**Posted by TheUnknown** August 3, 2022 6:21 pm

After 30 years of a beautiful marriage, my husband went off the rails, caught HIV, and committed suicide two hours after getting his positive test results.
After three years I am mending well, and my two older sons as well.
I can only assume that he was having sex with men. I am angry and forgiving at the same time.
Long Island Roman Catholic kid in the 1980s Italian family could never reveal a gay or bisexual identity.
I tested negative for HIV. But I am ANGRY, so angry of the infidelity and exposure to HIV.
Now, in the news, Monkey Pox and the gay community.
I can't bear to hear about it, anal sores, bath houses, gay raves. How many unsuspecting women will be exposed by filandering lying cheaters. Its not the sexuality I'm angry about, its the lies. And the exposures.
Any advice to quiet my anger?

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** August 3, 2022 10:29 pm

TheUnknown wrote:
......Now, in the news, Monkey Pox and the gay community.
I can't bear to hear about it, anal sores, bath houses, gay raves. How many unsuspecting women will be exposed by filandering lying cheaters. Its not the sexuality I'm angry about, its the lies. And the exposures.
Any advice to quiet my anger?

No advice And you're allowed to be angry, so be angry. Here in New Zealand we are told we probably won't have a problem with it. Hah! I hear on the news...."...it's 99% men having sex with men..." and I'm shouting at the tv "yes but....what about the unsuspecting wives of the cowardly gay men who aren't honest about their sexuality"
No-one mentions them. Not medical people, not the news stations, not the radio, haven't seen a word about it on the internet.

Fucking men. No Unknown....you go right ahead and start some conversations

Elle

**Posted by Gloria** August 4, 2022 7:50 am

I was deceived by a gay man who presented himself as hetrosexual. When I found out, I was shocked and angry. If these men would be honest with us, we would not suffer and worry about STD's. I am so very sorry.

**Posted by walkbymyself** August 5, 2022 10:14 am

I've posted about this in "Our Stories" -- my first inkling that my husband had cheated on me, was twelve years into the marriage when he called me in the middle of the night, on my 50th birthday, crying because he'd tested positive, twice, for HIV. His cover story: that he'd gotten it from a dirty needle in a rural clinic in the third world, long before we met. That meant he was telling me he'd been positive while we were still sexually active, and when we were trying to conceive our daughter, which was before I carried that pregnancy to term, delivered via C-section, and nursed her for the first year of her life.

So I had a pretty rough few days there, and I spent a lot of time online trying to figure out what the transmission rates were for heterosexuals. Interestingly: it's not that "gay" sex was riskier than "straight" sex. The statistics don't show that, if you count women. For women, it's gay sex that's safer than straight sex.

The statistics really showed that people of either sex who have sex with men, are at significantly greater risk than people of either sex who have sex with women. I'm trying to figure out what the truth is about monkeypox, because there are mixed messages about whether it's a similar issue. Married women who don't know that their husbands are cheating, are at risk, perhaps even moreso than gay men who know what the risk is.

**Posted by Motherpink62** August 9, 2022 8:32 pm

Hi everyone I too have just gotten confirmation that my husband of 10yrs has been having sex with men for at least 7 yrs….The saving Grace for me is we have not been intimate for almost 10 due to my husband feeling my total hysterectomy lessened his feeling 😂😂I can laugh now because it was a rues but I’m glad…Some May think 🤔 what no sex for almost the life of the marriage but trust me I was good with it and especially Now….Funny do to his heavy drinking he had me believing when he’d come home at 2,4 etc it was due to a night of excessive drinking and I bought it…A few days ago I find out it was because he was spending time with men who dress as women having sex and doing drugs….He’s a very good liar but yet God always led me to little signs.::I’ve become a great detective 🕵️ which makes lying 🤥 impossible even when he denied it..::..I even called out and up one of his lil freaks which surprised the freak as to how I knew what he had done for work, what he looked like and of course his phone number….The convo was just because I could not because I thought it would solve anything…I got my point across just by calling😂😂😂That person I’m legally tied to ( no children just 2 fur babies) doesn’t want a divorce 😵‍💫of course not why would he🤔But I’m like while you live in and work in another city while I live in our home in another city you expect me to be ok with that? I think not..::After at minimum 7-8 yrs of total disregard and disrespect why would I do that too myself….So he can have both worlds…Now that he’s been found out it doesn’t have the same allure as before? Don’t misunderstand there have been a few good moments but they are far between all the deceit and lies….Financially I’ll be in decent shape…Emotionally it will take sometime to heal but HEAL I will….I’ll move forward and he’ll still be waded down in the MUCKMIRe with the trash..::Ladies remember KARMA is REAl and all these nasty, vile disgusting men will feel it’s wrath…..Don’t let them control your emotion’s with their BS 🙏

**Posted by Gloria** August 10, 2022 6:14 am

Motherpink62, it sounds as though you are healing. The shock and sadness are real and I wish the best for you as you continue healing.

**Posted by Motherpink62** August 10, 2022 8:52 am

Thanks Gloria for your reply….Gloria if we ladies don’t find a way to heal the hurt, pain, etc we are allowing the dirty bastards to Win…I have 1 life and 1 only so it’s completely up to me to take it by the reigns and LIVE…The 1 thing about KARMA is you don’t have to wish it on anyone it will take care of itself….
Hugs 🤗 ladies it will get better 😊

**Posted by Gloria** August 11, 2022 6:43 am

Motherpink62 you are correct. We are here at this forum to encourage others. If my story helps just one person, it will be worth it. Sending you a hug

**Posted by Motherpink62** August 11, 2022 6:20 pm

To Gloria ❤️🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

**Posted by Gloria** August 12, 2022 7:36 am

Thank you Motherpink.