The essential differences in our experiences compared to heterosexual infidelity is in the way it strikes at our very sense of a stable self. You can always make allowances for the non gay cheating spouse by examining your own behaviour with a view to solving any issues and continuing the relationship. We on the other hand,  can do nothing to repair the damage to our inner selves when the very fact that we are essentially the wrong sex means that there is no hope of continuing the relationship to any advantage. There was absolutely nothing that we could have done to prevent this situation from happening once the deception was in place from the outset. The IED (intentional emotional device) from our partners was laid from the outset in many cases, to detonate the relationship at a future point. The way we feel afterwards reflects the deep hurt that the faith and love we had in another person was based on the premise that the focus of our feelings deserved this gift. I suppose it is similar to any natural parasitic relationship where the host gets nothing but loss and the parasite gets everything they need. We can only hope that in the future we can find the inner strength to enter a natural symbiotic relationship where both parties equally enjoy the benefits of love, trust, faith and support to be found in someone of genuine integrity.

4885 days...

Last edited by Ordinary guy (July 12, 2021 7:44 am)