OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / Let’s create a playlist! What ear worms live in our SSpouse psyche?

**Posted by OnMyOwnTwoFeet** December 10, 2018 3:11 pm

Hi, I could use some humor, so let's create a playlist for the straight spouse!

I’ve been reading on the site since June, but this is my first post. Yesterday I started to post my story and worries and grief, and it was too much. Today, I want to cheer myself up with some laughter. Please join me? I assume everyone wants a little laughter.

Getting dressed in bedroom with my husband this morning, I realized once again that the ear worm song in my head reflected my current mood. So, I give you actual songs unbidden in my head from past years before the big discovery up to how I was feeling this morning. These songs have stuck in my head for months at a time. And, of course, “Shuffle” is definitely a big part of my feelings playlist!

Playlist for the Straight Spouse—please add!

Let Her Go (Passenger)
I can’t make you love me if you don’t (Bonnie Raitt)
Too Much Too Little Too Late (Johnny Mathis and Denice Williams)
From now on, you’re only someone that I used to love (Natalie Cole)

And for fun, Pray for You by Jaron Lowenstein—seems serious at first but is funny! Since I am new to the site, it will not let me post the link. Sorry. But you can look it up! Also, I found Pray for You in “Cheaters, the Musical,” on infidelityhelpgroup.com.

**Posted by Zoso** December 10, 2018 6:27 pm

Heartbreaker- Led Zeppelin
Your time is gonna come- Led Zeppelin

Who are you-The Who

Last edited by Zoso (December 10, 2018 6:28 pm)

**Posted by OutofHisCloset** December 10, 2018 6:50 pm

"Watershed" Indigo Girls

**Posted by OnMyOwnTwoFeet** December 10, 2018 7:35 pm

Oh I like these! As soon as I get officially enough posts, I can add links, and then we are really singing.

Gotta say: being a Straight Spouse for so many years—but not knowing it—I have an arsenal of personal “try to be happy” distractions.

**Posted by Zoso** December 10, 2018 11:39 pm

What are the distractions? I could sure use some these days.

**Posted by Tyurk** December 11, 2018 11:09 pm

evanescence-going under

**Posted by OnMyOwnTwoFeet** December 12, 2018 12:14 am

Well, Zoso, on distractions. One thing I do is exaggerate for the humor effect, and I was doing that in that comment with the word “arsenal” for sure. But your earnest question from your pain hit my own pain, and it made me pause and wonder: was I really being honest about how I have an arsenal? And the answer is: kind of?

Speaking symbolically here, sometimes I can depend on my small collection of effective ninja toys, which sometimes I cannot find cuz everything is so damn messy right now.

I ended up,with a really long “coping” list, and I am going to post it out of this thread, in its own topic, on this same “support” board. Look for it there! Maybe other people will add to it. Or at least benefit? I will call it something like, “how to distract and cope” or “what is in your emotional arsenal.”

Best to you and to all of us. This is so crazy hard.

Last edited by OnMyOwnTwoFeet (December 12, 2018 1:17 am)

**Posted by OnMyOwnTwoFeet** December 12, 2018 12:16 am

“You can go your own way” by Fleetwood Mac!

**Posted by StrongerThanIKnew** December 12, 2018 9:48 am

When I am feeling strong and ready to stand up and fight for myself, Fight Song by Rachel Platten.

When I am feeling a little down, Wish You Were A Better Man by Little Big Town

**Posted by OutofHisCloset** December 12, 2018 6:57 pm

"I Knew" Bonnie Raitt.
I also altered a lot of song lyrics to make them fit... Eric Clapton's "One Chance" spoke to my doubts about leaving but also to what he was losing by his decisions.