OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / Betrayal Trauma

**Posted by StrongerThanIKnew** June 15, 2018 12:19 pm

Lynne mentioned this term in another post, and I had never heard the term before, so I googled it.

And all I can say is wow!!!

I have read many really good articles about it, but this one is a quick read. It spawns from people discovering their partners are watching porn, so while it doesn't specifically mention TGT or TTT, the result is the same because all deal with a partner hiding a sexual secret.

http://www.covenanteyes.com/2016/05/10/betrayal-trauma-the-side-of-pornography-use-no-one-is-talking-about/

Thank you, Lynne, for mentioning this. It has me looking at things in an entirely new light.

Stay Strong.

Last edited by StrongerThanIKnew (June 15, 2018 2:54 pm)

**Posted by lily** June 15, 2018 2:38 pm

oh well there you go. If I were a therapist and someone came in sounding as he described, i.e. exactly like one of us the first thing I'd do is wonder if their partner is gay.

**Posted by Lynne** June 15, 2018 5:33 pm

delete

Last edited by Lynne (February 3, 2019 1:10 pm)

**Posted by Lynne** June 17, 2018 12:25 pm

Deleted.

Last edited by Lynne (October 3, 2020 6:18 pm)

**Posted by StrongerThanIKnew** June 17, 2018 12:32 pm

Wondering89 wrote:
Honestly I have anxiety just reading all of that and not wanting to watch links..

I'm sorry, Wondering, I certainly don't want to add to any anxiety you already have.

Stay Strong

**Posted by StrongerThanIKnew** June 17, 2018 12:43 pm

For me, this idea of seeing this as trauma is new, but it absolutely fits what I am going through. I wonder why I would be fine, and I mean truly and sincerely fine. Then something would happen, and I would get so angry. I would think to myself that I thought I was over this anger stage of grief or depression only to find myself right back in the throes of it and feeling like I have made no headway.

Looking at it as trauma instead of grief though changes my perspective. I also didn't like thinking of it as co-dependency because that doesn't seem right either. This isn't because of some unhealthy attachment I had to my husband. This is a result of something that happened to me - was done to me - in a matter of speaking.

Anyway, I found it very enlightening and wanted to give it it's own thread for discussion.

Stay Strong.