I am 3,5 months post separation. My good days are turning into weeks. Then grief surprises me for couple of days, but it’s not knocking me out any more.
Since I can’t change my past and can’t change the fact that my ex is gay, or bi (still don’t know, and it doesn’t make a diference to me), the best thing I can concentrate on is- what’s in it for me?
I am willing, since the beginning of our end, to find things in my life that will make me a better, kinder, more honest and more brave person. And I am here to tell you that I somewhat stepped out of my comfort zone, and life is giving me what I need. I find it hardest to not be able to share my new joys with my ex. But then again, I CANT change that- he doesn’t want me anymore. So I share with friends. And with myself. And the day will come when I won’t be attached to him anymore.
I don’t know if I ever felt this much pain, but I also never had this much trust in life, and I know that I will be not just ok, but happy on a more profound and peaceful kind of level. Life gives.
I am reading all of your posts and feel with all of you.