Posted by LostAtSea  May 4, 2023 12:01 am | #1 |
It’s been awhile. 2 1/2 years out from D-day and for the last 2 wks, my mind has been going nuts. I’ve been having some crazy dreams and keep coming back to the movie - Inception. This trauma feels like someone stole my dreams of a happy marriage and life.
I even started to miss my old life because what I thought was so perfect and real. I compare this to people who stay with their abusers and never understood that mentality, but I now.
I must be the most naive person in the world because I never thought this could happen to me. Why would a “man” seek out a women to marry and live life with when all they wanted was to be “fulfilled by a man” and desire to transition to a “woman”. What kind of sick person does this? All comes down to being a sociopath but I still can’t see the sometimes.
I must still be in “Inception”…..
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Posted by clintonia May 9, 2023 10:37 pm | #2 |
"I even started to miss my old life because what I thought was so perfect and real." You want to go back to the dream state-- where the laws of physics don't apply-- which is what Inception was. I like your simile. 
Who wouldn't be tempted to return to beauty and perfection if given the chance, so long as it's real? The problem is that it was crafted to be perfect with lies and is a dangerous place. (I also remember the joy I felt for years when I was ignorant of reality.)
"This trauma feels like someone stole my dreams of a happy marriage and life." I agree. I think it changes one's outlook entirely. I still wonder if it's possible to rekindle those boundless dreams....?
If you haven't experienced it, you don't understand how reverberating an impact the deception has on others-- I wish more people recognized this.
I visited a PostSecret.org museum exhibit a few weeks ago, and these entries now remind me of it. Raw truth of things we don't feel we can voice publicly, but can share with certain others online. These snippets seem more artistic now.
