OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / OMG. When do i get to post? I am old and recently found out i was was

**Posted by Allison** November 18, 2017 1:16 am

a beard. your site is maligned.

**Posted by Allison** November 18, 2017 1:21 am

I am new at having a gay husband who hooks up with old boys, young 2o year olds to have anonymous sex every day. to and from work via craigslist. He is back at me.I lost him since the end of september, He's back. Home for the holidays i guess.

**Posted by Dee** November 18, 2017 7:18 am

Hi Allison,
You’re in the right place. Sorry you need to be here, but we all have been through this exact same thing in one way or another. I found out after what I thought was a happy 30 + years of marriage. That was 3 years ago. This site is free and monitored by awesome volunteers, so we make due with it being a bit encumbered. Here’s the thing, sounds like you aren’t together anymore? If so, good for you. Then why are you still in contact with him? I truly didn’t start to heal until I went NO CONTACT. That meant blocking him on everything. You don’t need to see him over the holidays, who cares what he wants! If you have young kids, that arrangement is spelled out in a custody agreement. Stay the course. Keep posting, we are here to listen.

**Posted by Rob** November 18, 2017 8:09 am

Allison,

I have not posted here for a bit but your post deserves replies.

The holidays are hard. These cheating gay spouses and ex spouses inflict their hurt and drama on what should be a time of connecting with loved ones with sincerity.

Do you have to let him back in for the holidays?.its not your problem if he has no one to spend them with. Tell him NO.. that he hurt you and,if kids are involved, he .can see them without you after you spend the holidays like you want.

This year my thought process is to not give my gay ex a second thought..she will always be hurtful around the holidays by taking/wanting the kids regardless of what my divorce settlement says. I will plan my holidays and my kids are welcome ...I will not fight or stress over her...she does not deserve any significance in my life or holidays.

A sincere wish to you and everyone here for strength,fortitude, and peace this holiday season.

**Posted by Kel** November 21, 2017 12:04 am

Allison,

Did you want him back home? Is he there because you asked him to come back / offered to take him back, or because he's somehow in charge of the decision of whether or not your marriage continues?

I'm sorry you're going through this. To and from work every day sounds..... horrendous, honestly. I'm so sorry.

When you said in your original post that "your site is maligned", what did that mean? Are you talking about this site here - the Straight Spouse Network? And if that's what you meant, what do you mean? Not trying to argue - trying to understand because I'm a bit lost as to what you meant.

Kel