Do not leave. That could be considered abandonment. Besides that you have a legal right to stay.

Can you share? That's a personal question but it's not going to be pleasant if there's animosity. New house rules would be probably necessary. It's also going to impede your personal healing if you are in constant daily contact. If you are certain on separating I would get started on a separation agreement so that issues like this are no longer a question mark. If there's a financial reason to continue living in the same house, or it's pending some other transaction, then both parties have to agree to take the high moral ground on all daily life.

Do see an attorney after the New Year so that you know what your rights are and do not do anything that is harmful to your interests. Having told your parents you have taken an important first step out of her closet and towards developing your future independent of her.

A year from now I think - hope - that you will be in a better place mentally. Life is a journey and yours is not over

She is upset that I am telling close family members.  Says she is a sitting duck!  Keeps saying how dysfunctional I am and so on.  I know the marriage had some low points, and some high points. But come on.   I guess it is her way to cope?  Keeps texting me at work about things.  I am not the one coming out.  I didn't want this marriage to end.  The woman I married is so gone.  Harsh to face that to be honest.  It all just kind of sucks!!!!!

yeah, she sounds upset.  Good for you, Count.  Let her comments roll off like water off a duck's back.  Don't let her turn it around.

It seems to me you are now seeing the real person who lives beneath the person you believed in.  The one who has entirely different thoughts to what you imagined, who has her own hidden feelings, who has not been honest with you, never was and still isn't now.

No really - sitting duck.  That sounds to me like she'd rather keep her position as married woman on the side while she gets on with her life as a lesbian.  It is very common for gay spouses to think like that but it floors me every time how selfish it is.  No care for the pain involved for anyone else just as long as they're comfortable in their closet.
 

Count,

I stayed in the same house for seven months until it was sold.  It was difficult but I'm glad I stayed for my daughter and to keep some sort of normalcy for her. 
As for his news, I kept my ex's news quiet for my 14 year old daughter's sake.  She doesn't like talking about it and doesnt want anyone to know his news.  The part that annoys me is that he hasn't told his own family...yet our daughter carries the burden of knowing his truth.  They blame me for the divorce.  Karma for him is living with the constant fear of others finding out his news.  His paranoia is through the roof. 

Catherine