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- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: It's time for an update from everyone
Here's an update....the Australian Same-sex Marriage Bill has just been passed successfully. I've been watching the reports of the celebration of this.....in the gay community.
I see it now
....with a totally different set of eyes
KIA KAHA
- Kel
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Re: It's time for an update from everyone
I like that it's legal now. It means they don't need to marry us straights in order to be married or have kids. And hey, why shouldn't they have the right to be as miserable as the rest of us, after all??? Lol. Kidding there.
The more normalized and accepted the gay thing becomes, the less people will feel like they need to live an inauthentic life in order to please others. That means less straight spouses and families will be hurt.
Kel
You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.
- •
Thread Starter- Tamiam
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Re: It's time for an update from everyone
Hi everyone,
I've been gone from SSN for a couple of months. I'm doing ok. I am just over 1 year post-disclosure. I was able to file for divorce last week. Now it's just a matter of waiting for the official decree. There have been some big highs and big lows, but the kids and I really are doing all right. Some highlights of the last few months:
- I did that solo concert in October. I actually did it.
- My son was hospitalized again. He's home now and we're continuing to make improvements.
- My daughter is back home. She had been living at a friend's house for almost a year. It is indeed wonderful to have her home.
- We made it through Thanksgiving holiday well, with new traditions and a great getaway trip to a friend's lake house.
- Work seems steadier. I'm feeling better about it.
- Communication with STBX is certainly still strained and awkward. It probably always will be. But most of the time, I can say what I need to say with strength, honesty, and brevity. It's always hard and I still shake afterward.
-Just trying to stay steady and strong. I still fall into shock mode sometimes, but I can work my way out of it.
- Mirky
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Re: It's time for an update from everyone
I'm doing alright. I bought a motorcycle and did a lot of "air therapy" over the summer. Changed my diet and lost a lot of weight. Met a few straight girls and had fun with them, though I've been clear that I'm not ready for a real relationship yet. I'm working on getting all traces of her out of my living space, though it can still be hard when I go through things and old memories are stirred up. Dissolution is moving forward, and I'm ready for it to happen now. I have little contact with her but when I do, it is usually limited and businesslike, which is probably for the best. The worst part for me, of course, is that I still love her. I still feel like she might be coming home at any time, or that she will be beside me when I wake up in the morning, or there to support me after a hard day at work. Then I have to remind myself that I'm on my own... why do I love someone that betrayed me and my trust so badly? I do not want her back, but I do long for my life to be back the way it was before she fell in love with a woman... it's gone, but I miss it. I don't sit around crying anymore, so I'm glad on that, though I do occasionally succomb to bouts of mild depression. I feel less resentment toward all things homosexual now, which had been an issue for me. But yeah, things are getting better all the time.
Oh, almost forgot - my daughter is graduating from college soon and I'm very proud of her!
Last edited by Mirky (December 11, 2017 9:27 pm)
- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: It's time for an update from everyone
Mirky wrote:
I don't sit around crying anymore, so I'm glad on that,
Mirky can I ask.....how long did it take for 'you' to not sit around crying?
Months....years?
KIA KAHA
- Rob
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Re: It's time for an update from everyone
Mirky,
Kudos.. Brought a motorcycle etc.
That's the way to move on. Don't even give these people that hurt us a second thought.
"For we walk by faith, not by sight .." 2Corinthians 5:7
- Mirky
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Re: It's time for an update from everyone
I don't sit around crying anymore, so I'm glad on that,
Mirky can I ask.....how long did it take for 'you' to not sit around crying?
Months....years?
I'd say it was months, since it hasn't been years yet, but yeah. I'm not going to say I don't get all verclempt if I find some of her things, or photos of us together, etc... but those are triggered reactions. I don't just do it for no reason anymore.
Funny thing is I'm upset to the point of crying over something else tonight and the first thing I think of is my wife, whom should be the one I go to for something like that... and of course, I have nobody, so I guess I have to "suck it up buttercup". Oh well, single life. AmIright?