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I'm just so angry right now that my husband coming out is affecting everything in my life! I'm barely functioning at work or home. I've told my sister but I don't think she knows what to say because we are struggling to carry on conversation now or maybe she doesn't believe me because he is so 'manly'. Then yesterday the truck blew an oil line on the way home and I was so caught up in my churning thoughts and emotions I didn't realize it until I got home and there was no oil left in the motor! I'm so frustrated and angry right now... almost more with myself for being this way. For letting him ruin everything else in addition to our relationship! Will I ever be happy, whole and functioning normally again??
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Last edited by Duped (November 11, 2019 2:41 pm)
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Tinkerbell,
So sorry.. I finding I'm not as resilient to stress and everyday problems also... stuff that used to be no big deal seems harder now.. I try to remind myself that it used to be no big deal and to follow through and do what needs to be done. But yeah..I recall shaking at work as I tried to do my work.. these spouses.
Just remember its bad fonly for now.. trudge through it one day at a time.. Its a valley...we need to get through the valley..through the fire, through the flood.
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Tinkerbell, of course you're struggling, who wouldn't? Don't expect that you should be coping better, your whole world has been rocked, it takes time to process the lies we were fed for so long. Don't be so hard on yourself, I think because we kept the show going for so long, we feel that we should do the same now once the truth is out, you need processing time. You probably think you're drowning, that's what I felt for so long but no one outside my closest circle would have known there was anything up with me. I did the most stupid things imaginable, things that even I wondered how I managed to do that!
It's a crisis you're in and how we deal with a crisis is in the flight or fight mode, everything seems a panic and it will be for awhile. It'll get easier, you'll find yourself managing a little better in time, just take it one day at a time and don't expect too much too soon.
If your sister is finding it too hard to comprehend perhaps try someone else or ask your sister what she finds hardest about it and see if she can put her feelings into words and in turn a conversation might develop.