Just wanted to be clear that I wasn't suggesting that anyone who's busy enough won't want a life partner.  I know for me, I wanted that very badly.  The further away I got from my former marriage, the more I realized that I never really DID have the love and partner that I'd craved.  I wanted something where I felt like part of a team, not like the whole team.  I wanted to feel cherished, not tolerated.  For me, it wasn't a matter of wanting those things BACK as much as it was me wanting to experience them EVER.  I was SUPER busy being a single mom of 3 and working full time (with over an hour commute each way), and I'm a spontaneous individual - I was never lacking for something to do.  That didn't mean that I didn't miss love.  I wanted it badly.  And I don't think I was going to be truly happy and fulfilled until I found that again.  I was right - I feel very whole now.

My whole point is that anyone will feel lonely if they're not out there enough - even the people who don't crave a partnership.  And I believe that the more interesting and balanced we are as individuals, the more attractive we are as an option for others who are looking.  No one answers the personals ad of: "I do nothing all day - I'm waiting on YOU to make my life worth living."  They all want, "I'm active with friends, family, and things that make me happy and interest me.  I enjoy my life and wish to add to it, not have you "make" it."  THAT's what we all want.  If you are wanting the best relationship in the future, you're fully half of that.  Bring a lot to the table and you'll have a better chance of attracting an equally awesome partner that is interested in you.

I think you all got what I was saying.  I just wanted to clarify.

As for my awesome new neighbors, I do realize they're not typical.  I managed to get to the ripe old age of 47 before I had neighbors who would slow their roll and introduce themselves when they saw us all out doing yardwork.  They've all lived here forever - most of them inherited these homes from their parents - so they grew up here.  So they all knew each other as kids.  I think that's the difference.  We're "fresh meat" to them.  Lol.  The other day they told us a story about the old couple we bought the house from.  They said, "Yeah, Pete could be a drinker.  Sometimes he'd get wasted and start wandering around in the driveway.  Eventually his wife Julia would come out and be like, "Pete, come IN already!", and Pete'd start yelling, "No one LIKES you, Julia!"  Lol!!!

Kel
 

Such great comments. I swear, sometimes I come back here not only to try to help others but to revalidate the things I'm feeling.  

I used to think that everyone had their one soul mate.  I'm starting to realize that different people can be your soul mate at different times in your life.  People change, habits form and change and form again.  Eventually you become who you are and you know exactly what you want whereas you might not have known that at a younger age.  I think the same is true for meeting a partner.  The guy/girl next to you may not have been right for you 10 years ago, but they might be your match made in heaven today.  Phoenix is right - you will feel the change when you're ready.  And Kel, your story inspires me every day.  I know we can find what you have - we just have to remember to get out there and try.  It's not going to knock on our door, walk in, and sit in our lap.  Although I'd prefer that to happen.  Much less effort. 

On a funny note - I was outside last night and a neighbor comes up to say they want to try to plan a block party.  Those who know me know that I have no poker face so I couldn't stop the big laugh that came out of my mouth (I'm thinking in the back of my head - are you reading the SSN blog?)!  Hopefully we won't have a Pete and Julia situation!

Ok so I'm curious what's a Pete and Julia moment?  Kel I have been thinking about starting a Facebook account if I do you will be my first request. Lol

It's from the comment Kel made above about her old neighbors named Pete and Julia. Nothing like a drunk neighbor to stir up some fun! 

Gotcha!!