Hi Sue,
Did you notice any side effects from Paxil, weight gain?

Well I just got back from a business trip, and I cried in the airplane and in the ladies room and in the car. Haven't done that in literally months. This was the first day I didn't take any medication, but I'm petty sure it couldn't have been such an immediate reaction, since Is is supposed to leave your system gradually. Unless I just hit the tipping point. That said, could be just the loneliness of traveling alone and the let down after a good trip.

I was going to come home and take a pill immediately but I think I'll wait and see how the weekend goes. I know it's ok to cry, but like I said, I can't go back to the place I was at last January. I really can't.

To Keepinghope and jkpeace,

Your stories hit home - long marriages and children. The divorce process is so painful, but when it's over you'll be relieved. There still will be other painful adjustments ahead, especially with children. Yet nothing in this experience compares to the pain of discovering you're married to a deceiver who stole authenticity from your marriage and mooched you out of years of your life. To me that was intolerably creepy - the deal breaker, especially as the lies still continued.

We straights all wondered what was wrong as our spouses dragged us along and watched us suffer. I see now that my ex enjoyed my bewilderment. He saw me in anguish over his behavior, yet he continued the emotional abuse through his charade.

The progress in moving forwards shows in these posts. Acceptance helps with the healing process.

You'll know when you're ready to start weaning off meds by how you function. You're doing it right. You consulted your doctor. The PTSD symptoms will likely still happen at times with or without meds. This is traumatic and recovery takes time.

Keep posting. You are not alone in this club that no one wanted to join. There is healing, peace, hope, and happiness again to be found. Stay strong.

Hi Sue, definitely tapering off slowly, and I might wait a bit longer before lowering it again. I'm at half dose, and the next step is every other day. Now that I'm officially past the one year mark (and survived the day) I think things will seem brighter again. It's possible that my anniversary just triggered a bunch of feelings and tears that would have happened no matter what. Thank you.

I'm off the ADs...  I'm wondering if I even need to go back to my pill lady for a check up..  I'm thinking I can say time and money.  I want to thank her  but a note can do that.