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1 - gwendolyn_C
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I officially filed for a divorce today. So many mixed emotions!
I'm physically exhausted, as it was one of my life's most challenging mental moments. However, I KNOW it is the right path for me and my children. I was going over the process with my almost ex-husband yesterday, and he had the nerve to ask if I was sure this was what I wanted. I took the opportunity to tell him no; I didn't want to find myself married to someone who broke the covenant of our marriage. The audacity of him asking me this question when he is the one to destroy this marriage by expecting me to accept that he's emotional and physical connections to his 'new' friend. I ended that conversation by telling him to stop lying to yourself. It's not normal for a married man to spend all of his time with a particular group of people, and you're not gay. I asked him if he'd heard of Interpersonal relationships or the saying "Birds of Feather. Flock together". So please don't ask me if this is what I want! That's an insult! I can see if he has changed his behaviors and TRIED fighting for me. This man spends 3-4 nights with his new friends! He quickly got off the phone!
Since this is an uncontested divorce and all children's matters are settled, I should be divorced by early May! I believe the hard part is over, but these steps are painful. I'm slightly numb today, but I know better days are ahead!
- 647osd
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Re: I officially filed for a divorce today. So many mixed emotions!
You are a very gutsy, brave woman. Kudos to you. The hard part is over. The great part is to come. I admire that you refuse to waste time trying to figure out your husband because it's obvious. They will suck the life right out of you if you let them.
- lily
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Re: I officially filed for a divorce today. So many mixed emotions!
wow - yes gutsy is the right word, good for you.
- Blackie563
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Re: I officially filed for a divorce today. So many mixed emotions!
Happy for you.Not easy. Also happy it is not contested. Hopefully you get what you need to survive and move forward. The best days are ahead, I can attest. My life got exponentially better once my lying, narc of an ex wife was out of my life. Kudos!
- gwendolyn_C
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Re: I officially filed for a divorce today. So many mixed emotions!
Thank you guys! I am stepping into a new Era of good love, happiness, and peace! The steps are hard but I know it will be worth it!
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Thread Starter- Abby
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Re: I officially filed for a divorce today. So many mixed emotions!
With your positive attitude your future should be great!
Try Gardening. It'll keep you grounded.
- gwendolyn_C
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Re: I officially filed for a divorce today. So many mixed emotions!
I guess I am gutsy 🥰. I took about 3 years to get here!
It took me about a year to strategically plan my exit! I negotiated to give him a more significant portion of the home sale whenever we sell (no time soon - can’t sell until the last kid finishes high school). It prevents him from touching my assets and retirement. The good part is he’s not a vindictive man. He only cares about our children, his career, and his friends so he didn't fight too much.
I am convinced that he married me to have children and don't want anything else to do with a woman! So it was easier to blame me for the demise of our marriage instead of accepting that he’s gay! But he has admitted that he is bi-sexual! I think he is in Throuple because he spends all of his free time at a married gay couple’s home. He says that he has gotten closer to ‘them.’ It sounds like a throuple to me, but I no longer care! It feels good! He can spend his nights wherever he pleases. I only care about how well we can co-parent together! He is a very hands-on Father so I will move on and choose to focus on the positives!
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Thread Starter- Rob
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Re: I officially filed for a divorce today. So many mixed emotions!
Congrats and steady on. Head held high, face in the wind. These spouses divorced us long ago with their secret, lies, and lack of true absolute love. The divorce now is pomp and circumstance, a moral consequence of what they did.
You were strong and fierce for staying as long as you did. This is not us leaving them, this is them rejecting us.
"For we walk by faith, not by sight .." 2Corinthians 5:7
- gwendolyn_C
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Re: I officially filed for a divorce today. So many mixed emotions!
Thank you guys for all the well wishes! This group has helped me in many ways!
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Thread Starter- gwendolyn_C
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Re: I officially filed for a divorce today. So many mixed emotions!
Guys - I'm one step closer to my divorce! I returned all the paperwork on Friday, and our 15-minute virtual court date is May 8th. It's an absolute divorce (Marital Settlement Agreement completed last May). I recall going to the courthouse on March 1st with mixed feelings (sorrowful). No one gets married to be here (especially not under these circumstances). However, I left the courthouse on Friday with relief. I'm bringing closure, and a new chapter will start. I had the biggest smile on my face leaving the courthouse!
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Thread Starter