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I read her story too.
Yep holding on to somebody's secret when that secret has ruined your life is so unfair.
As is his unspoken threat to kill himself if she outed him.
E
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What touched me the most is that that there is no feeling of anger in this post. And still lots of love.
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At the bottom of the page under "Our Stories"
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Thank you for reading my story and for your support. If I'm honest there has been waves of anger, but my overarching feeling is relief. For years I internalized feelings of being undesirable and parent guilt for not wanting to be a stay at home. All along my body knew something was wrong, but my mind couldn't figure out what it could be. His PTSD muddied the waters and he definitely used it to excuse behaviors that had nothing to do with combat. Out of loyalty and sympathy I just kept accepting the emotional abuse, I didn't want to trade his and our children's happiness for my own. This discovery was the information I was missing. This is my ticket to freedom. Now I can walk away with confidence and without guilt and with the knowledge that it wasn't my failure. And I have enough evidence on him that he's not fighting me on anything, but he's being very cold still. The fact that I was already seeking therapy has definitely helped me process the anger. My therapist suggested I be as honest as I can with my friends and family about the infidelity, without mentioning their gender. And she felt this forum was a great place for me to be able to be wholly truthful. So, I truly appreciate what's been created here.