OurPath Open Forum

This Open Forum is funded and administered by OurPath, Inc., (formerly the Straight Spouse Network). OurPath is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit that provides support to Straight Partners and Partners of Trans People who have discovered that their partner is LGBT+. Your contribution, no matter how small, helps us provide our community with this space for discussion and connection.


You are not logged in. Would you like to login or register?

May 10, 2023 2:11 pm  #21

Re: Two Years Too Much

How could it backfire though? What's the worst that could happen? Shouldn't I be shouting it from the rooftops so that another unsuspecting straight woman is not lured into his trap again?


May 11, 2023 2:23 pm  #22

Re: Two Years Too Much


I think it is a form of contact and I'm alive by the rule..NO CONTACT.    Any future woman are not your problem..will they get hurt..most definitely, probably..getting involved you open yourself up to contact from him. There is always a cost to contact with a sociopath.  No contact.

Being divorced I strive to teach my GX the meaning of the word divorced..she has forfeited all rights and privileges to my time, talents, and fierce loyalty and love..I gave it..she chose to hurt and not want it. Took her sometime to realize that she no longer had the benefits of the marriage in which I was problem solver and punching bag.   

I also try to leave vengeance to God..  it may come down to later I see she is violating the divorce settlement and I have to go back to court..but for now I leave it God..  I truly believe or hope he is looking down and sees the difference between wrong and right  .. I give it up to him.

Last edited by Rob (May 11, 2023 2:26 pm)

"For we walk by faith, not by sight .."  2Corinthians 5:7

May 12, 2023 5:49 am  #23

Re: Two Years Too Much

Hi Rob, I'm a non-believer in God or any religion. I also don't believe in the common idea of "karma". I believe that in order to improve or better society, we must be vigilent and take care of one another while we are here, and that includes preventing a crime or an injustice from happening in the future if we can, by speaking up. I think victims should be speaking to each other and exchanging information rather than staying silent and protecting the perpetrator. What does "GX" mean?

     Thread Starter

May 12, 2023 9:59 am  #24

Re: Two Years Too Much

chelhell wrote:

I think victims should be speaking to each other and exchanging information rather than staying silent and protecting the perpetrator. What does "GX" mean?

Interesting. I am similar in the sense I do not subscribe to any religion or particular religious doctrine. That said, I agree and disagree. I agree it is important to help others and speak out, but I disagree that it is your responsibility to chase this down and do it at your own peril. I have thought the same of telling my GX (Gay ex) that my ex-wife looks for men while telling the world she is a lesbian to avoid responsibility for breaking her vows to me and destroying our family. But you know what? Maybe her new girlfriend likes the same? Or maybe she doesn't and is being lied too just like I was for years. I could try to find out, but I simply do not care. I can not solve all of the worlds problems and involving myself in that business where I know I am dealing with a highly manipulative, narcissistic person, I feel I only increase the probability of damage vs. helping. The new partner will figure it out....or they won't. My job is to protect my kids, not this other grown ass adult from making bad decisions. 

I understand your point of view and in many cases I agree, but not in this one. I wish you the best of luck.


May 15, 2023 6:08 pm  #25

Re: Two Years Too Much

When I was with another partner before this marriage we were into the BDSM scene. Also my current husband is into some of the same things yours is. Your husband's fetishes will not go away. Period. He will not outgrow them, he will not get tired of them. They are an addiction and he will need more and more until he crashes and then he'll take a break, maybe even throw it all out and then soon enough start again to collect things. If this was a long term marriage and everything else was good, meaning you still had a loving relationship I'd say you could maybe live with it. But I'm sorry I do agree with everyone else. End this marriage to set you both free. He needs more than you can give and to give it will destroy your soul.


Board footera


Powered by Boardhost. Create a Free Forum