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1 - longwayhome
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The Secret Basement - Dr Omar Minwalla
The Secret Sexual Basement” is a metaphor to help us better understand the concept of a deceptive, compartmentalized, sexual-relational reality (DCSR) in the context of an intimate relationship(s) or family system. It represents a person’s deceptively hidden sexual, romantic, and/or emotional intimacy with others that is not shared with the primary intimate partner
https://secureservercdn.net/72.167.241.180/226.c7e.myftpupload.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/The-Secret-Sexual-Basement_2_12_21.pdf
Last edited by longwayhome (March 14, 2021 1:41 pm)
I never cease to wonder at the cruelty of this land, but it seems a time of sadness is a time to understand, is it mine, oh lord is it mine, when everything is dark ….. Roger Hodgson.
- OutofHisCloset
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Re: The Secret Basement - Dr Omar Minwalla
Incredibly useful paper, longwayhome. Thanks for posting the link.
- Lynne
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Re: The Secret Basement - Dr Omar Minwalla
Admin, please pin longwayhome's post.
Edited to add that the full title is "The Secret Sexual Basement: The Traumatic Impacts of Deceptive Sexuality on the Intimate Partner and Relationship"
Last edited by Lynne (March 14, 2021 7:55 pm)
- Upside
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Re: The Secret Basement - Dr Omar Minwalla
Thank you, Longwayhome. This is remarkable.
Edit: I feel this should be pinned.
Last edited by Upside (March 16, 2021 10:45 am)
- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: The Secret Basement - Dr Omar Minwalla
"3. Erosion of Relational Integrity"
I've thought it. I've felt it. Initially I was confused by it. It took 3 years to really know, and admit to myself that this is what happened.
Elle
KIA KAHA
- Toward the Light
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Re: The Secret Basement - Dr Omar Minwalla
Wow, Longwayhome. This link is a gift. I’m processing what it says but I’m pretty sure that this is the first academic paper I’ve read that seems to try to understand the injury of what happened to me, and us. I’m so grateful for the information. Thank you.
Last edited by Toward the Light (March 15, 2021 2:06 pm)
- MJM017
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Re: The Secret Basement - Dr Omar Minwalla
Thank you, longwayhome! This paper is profoundly helpful.
No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa
- Blue Bear
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Re: The Secret Basement - Dr Omar Minwalla
This is a really good paper. I found it very interesting and (unfortunately) relatable. We desperately need to have papers like this published in respected journals.
The take-home message is that a covert sexual identity in a relationship is abuse. To me, it's very difficult to encourage people to try to work it out post discovery or disclosure.
Thanks for sharing.
- JoeC
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Re: The Secret Basement - Dr Omar Minwalla
100% good paper, its dense, but its on point! Now the next part I want to see is treatment and long term follow up and what its like on the other side, when those (us) are "better"