OurPath Open Forum

This Open Forum is funded and administered by OurPath, Inc., (formerly the Straight Spouse Network). OurPath is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit that provides support to Straight Partners and Partners of Trans People who have discovered that their partner is LGBT+. Your contribution, no matter how small, helps us provide our community with this space for discussion and connection.


BE A DONOR >>>


You are not logged in. Would you like to login or register?



April 22, 2021 10:18 pm  #41


Re: Snooping for Curious Spouses

Gmail on a laptop/desktop has Google Hangouts, which is used for hookups. It’s accessible under settings (Click on the wheel), more settings, chat on/off.

You have to select chat on to view it. You may see a history of texts, photos and videos. Easy to hide Hangouts history by turning chat off in settings.  It’s a standalone app on Apple and on Google play on Android.

The rebound cheater guy I dated after my divorce used this to chat with me. A few years ago you couldn’t hide your contacts on it. I saw his were mostly attractive women.

JoDownUnder, sorry this happened.  I know from experience it’s painful.

Maria

Last edited by MJM017 (April 22, 2021 10:19 pm)


No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa 
 

June 11, 2021 12:28 pm  #42


Re: Snooping for Curious Spouses

Thank you, Maria! I'm sorry, just seeing this now. Will flow in.

Update: v1.03 - Added in a section about Bluetooth and Wi-Fi connections, Google Hangouts, and Dehashed.

     Thread Starter
 

November 1, 2021 3:38 pm  #43


Re: Snooping for Curious Spouses

After all this,…and, I really hate to say it, because if it had been this way when I searched when my husband was cheating…if it was this way, I never would have found all the stuff I found on his computer. Even though it was AT&T and a contact in his phone that I matched to their records that did the ‘trick, I never would have even thought to look there if I hadn’t found all that stuff on the computer. I learned how to find deleted searches and more…

NOW YOU CAN’T DO THAT on Chrome and probably others. I haven’t looked.

They have “Incognito” mode now, where you can search and leave absolutely NO history…….NONE. So, deleted history doesn’t matter since there is none. It’s on iPads and computers. The industry has made it easy to cheat.

phtttttt!

Last edited by SusanneH (November 1, 2021 3:39 pm)

 

November 1, 2021 5:20 pm  #44


Re: Snooping for Curious Spouses

Hi Susanne,

Maybe Upside can chime in. I'm an IT person - mostly software and databases Am not into programming browsers or operating systems where history can be seen. I'll try to poke around my stuff (an iPhone and an MS laptop). 

You can delete easily google search history w/o resorting to incognito mode in Chrome. I use Firefox by Mozilla mostly and it's the same.  Apple Safari and MS Edge are the other ones people use. I googled how to do it for all. It's easy. 

What about disabling virus protection software like Norton or McAfee?  Viruses mean they've gone to porn sites.

Sometimes good old gut feeling/instincts/intuition and a visit to ChumpLady are better.  Slamming doors and nasty looks can work to your advantage.

Hope all is ok.
 

Last edited by MJM017 (November 1, 2021 5:22 pm)


No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa 
 

November 1, 2021 6:44 pm  #45


Re: Snooping for Curious Spouses

I was able to look up website passwords (along with the website name) that were set to autofill in the Chrome incognito tab.  You click on the vertical three dots on the upper right and select Settings. It takes you right there.

Bookmarks are there too. It's a pain to delete those.  Downloads and history can be easily cleared though. Sorry if a repeat.

Your spouses may use a password vault and bypass the autofill for passwords.





 


No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa 
 

November 2, 2021 1:39 pm  #46


Re: Snooping for Curious Spouses

MJM017 wrote:

 

 

It was so exhausting.....this snooping, when I thought I had to do it.! 
and such a relief when it didn't matter anymore

I just wish I could live my life over. Wish I'd known/been strong enough, when
the Mindfuck showed itself as the life-changing thing it was, to draw a line in 
the sand and step over it and away. No snooping, no argument, no compromise

Damn it....*I* will never be who I was.

 


 


KIA KAHA                       
 

November 9, 2021 6:32 pm  #47


Re: Snooping for Curious Spouses

I am certain my late GIDXH simply left the house to find action.  It may be true for your male partner, especially if you haven't heard of arrests for indecent exposure in your locale.  A private detective may be your best bet.

I found an old article explaining why cruising is a popular activity despite hookup apps.

https://www.ebar.com/news/news//151042

An excerpt:

He frequently hooks up with other men in the park. That includes men he's sure live their lives as straight, based in part on how self-loathing they seem after sex.

Despite the fact there's no lighting in much of the park, and rats were scurrying around nearby, the man said, "For me, this is one of the safest places I know. I know the dynamics. I know what people are looking for. I've had a lot of fun here."

However, he added, "If you really think you're going to have a solid relationship" with anyone you meet there, "you have to understand this is where you met them, and this is what it is."


No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa 
 

November 12, 2021 6:34 pm  #48


Re: Snooping for Curious Spouses

Private detectives are expensive. There was a poster who placed a GPS tracker in her h's vehicle. GPS placed him at a public park/rest stop where anonymous gay hookups were occurring.

Here's the post:

https://straightspouse.boardhost.com/viewtopic.php?id=2063

Last edited by MJM017 (November 12, 2021 6:36 pm)


No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa 
 

Board footera

 

Powered by Boardhost. Create a Free Forum