OurPath Open Forum
This forum is for discussion of issues related to Mixed Orientation relationships only, that is when one partner is heterosexual (straight) and one is Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender or Questioning.
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- SupportiveHusband
- New member
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Re: Help, support, advice,...whatever you got.
First off, all of you are awesome. I can not tell you what a relief it is to talk (or write) about this and have people who listen and take the time to answer with thoughtful, honest opinions. Just since yesterday, my wife and I have talked alot about this and really honestly laid out what we want and what we need. We discovered that alot of our needs, weren't really needs and alot of our wants (that we were afraid to ask for) are happily supplied by the other person. We are riding a happy high from our conversation (and subsequent activities) that might not last, but right now it feels good. I'm going to look into the ethical-non monogamy relationships and see what I am able and willing to do. Until we get into it, I won't know for sure. I do know I love my wife and she loves me. I know that she never wants me to feel hurt or pain, but also doesn't want to repress herself (as I would not want her to either). It's tricky and I'm sure will get trickier. I'll keep you all updated and I can not say how much I am grateful for the responses.
- Epiphany
- Member
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Re: Help, support, advice,...whatever you got.
Hi SupportiveHusband, our situations are somewhat similar. My husband is Bisexual, we love eachother dearly, I don’t want him living a lie or repressing things but I want to feel desired again and we both want to try to move forward together. Our situations are different in that he has sought to feel his needs outside our marriage on and off throughout the years, creating a pattern that was recently brought to light upon my discovery of his several cybersex relationships with other men.. with talks of meeting up in real life.
I’ve already searched my soul and heart and know that I’m not ok with him having a side relationship to fulfill his desires. Why? Because it leads to the opportunity for him to fall in love with someone else and takes his efforts and heart away from us. We’ve talked about what I am ok with. .bringing it into the bedroom via different foremast, which we have had promising results from. I agree that you married her with the intention of being eachother’s everything. This situation is so hard because you can have the deepest love for someone, like other worldly and beyond unconditional it are faced with having to feel like you are undesirable, not enough and having to self sacrifice your own needs and wants.
Stay strong in those needs and wants. Go to couples counseling and talk talk talk. Don’t ever feel guilty for being jealous or hurt though, you and I...all of us, have the right to those emotions.
Best of luck!!
- Epiphany