So last December, after finding out my husband was attracted to men, I found the SSN. I decided to tell my story to look for any kind of help I could get. I was at an all time low last year and for the months following. So I came on here, chose a false user name (angie1)... and told my story.
The responses were life changing! For the first time in my journey, I wasn't alone and that reality gave me life again. I was still in the phase where I knew I wanted out of my marriage but at that point had absolutely NO self esteem. My husband had broken me down little by little until I didn't know who I was without him.
He would say that our lack of sex was because I was too sexual. He would say I only wanted him for sex... that he ONLY looked at gay porn when we were fighting. He said he only watched gay porn to make himself feel safe. He told me that I needed to not tell people about him because it was "worldly and sinful" to ask for advice from non-Christian people. So so many lies... but I believed them. I believed that I was the one that needed help, that I was the one that was over-sexual and I should be more holy.
Fast forward to where I am now. I am currently still married but am filing for divorce today. The last straw for me was when I had a conversation with my husband about two weeks ago where I told him in order to save our marriage, he was going to have to acknowledge the pain that he caused me. He looked me in my face and told me that he would NEVER apologize to me again and that I should just forgive him.  
Instead of running to him, taking all the blame, and giving him some unnecessary apology (like I had always done in the past) it finally clicked in my head that I will NEVER be truly loved by this man. To him, I am just his cover. I am his object that he needs in order for him to present to the world who he wants so badly to be. To him, I represent his inward shame and turmoil.
That was the last straw. I was done. I felt free knowing that his abuse had nothing to do with me and EVERYTHING to do with HIM.
Since that moment I have been overjoyed to leave. I know it seems heartless but I am so happy to not be under his thumb anymore. I am free and you can be too!
I'm not going to tell anyone to stay married or divorce... but I will encourage you to find out WHO you are to your spouse. Does your spouse really love you... or are they using you? Really be honest with yourself. I want everyone to have the same freedom that I have experienced. WE DESERVE BETTER! I don't want to spend my limited time on this earth fighting for the love of a man that can never give it to me.
IM GOING TO SET MYSELF FREE!