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September 23, 2017 10:06 am  #11


Re: My narcissistic rage

Duped wrote:

I just can't handle the abandonment it pushes all my buttons so I can't think or act straight.

Exactly and that is why he is doing this. It's another form of control and attention seeking.
The worst thing you can do to a toxic narcissist is ignore them.

As was said earlier by another, channel your anger. You can use it to further your journey.

To quote Reinhold Niebuhr:
"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference."
 


“The future is unwritten.”
― Joe Strummer
 

September 23, 2017 11:15 am  #12


Re: My narcissistic rage

Thank you all for your support, this came out of nowhere, I thought I was doing ok. I really appreciate you rallying me like this. I've had the usual excuses but I'm not interested in listening to more reasons for someone to be completely self-interested and self-destructive.

I'm calmer, I did a lot of crying so I feel better for that. Just trying to focus on doing and planning so that my environment is calm and relaxing, some nice food etc. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

     Thread Starter
 

September 23, 2017 5:06 pm  #13


Re: My narcissistic rage

You did great Duped.  You continue to do great.  

There is nothing wrong with you being angry.  That rage is completely normal.  Wanting to lash out at your tormentor and make them feel some pain and guilt and shame is to be expected.  There is nothing wrong with you for feeling those feelings.  But that doesn't mean you have to do it.  You rose above it last night. Congratulations.  

I do still stand by my original statement.  You don't have to keep his secret if it makes life worse for you.  If sharing the truth helps you and makes a difference in your life, then you can do that.  But, if sharing the truth is done for malicious reasons, then I think it's a poor choice and will leave you with guilt and most likely unfavorable judgment from others.  

Tomorrow will be a better day for sure!  Keep going.. one day at a time!


-Formerly "Lostdad" - I now embrace the username "phoenix" because my former life ended in flames, but my new life will be spectacular. 

 
 

September 24, 2017 3:36 am  #14


Re: My narcissistic rage

Thanks Phoenix, you're right, it would be a poor choice and I would just feel worse for it. I need to work on those triggers though, I'm not sure how because the feelings just take me over. Today is better, more self-care, thanks all.

     Thread Starter
 

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