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Mon Jul 17 2:53 pm  #701


Re: A gay ex-husband answers your questions

ellexoh,

We are not really alone.  We have just lost our best friend and spouse.   What I'm finding is the world is not centered around them...they made us think that it is ..and it would be ok if they were normal..but they are just hurtful, insatiable beings.     You or I could never do this a friend let alone spouse..  but they want us to say for them its ok.. its ok if you hurt me...      it is not.  

Gather strength ..  start thinking about what you want .   For myself I wanted a loving safe home where someone didn't hurt me over and over.  


a kind virtual hug


 


"For we walk by faith, not by sight .."  2Corinthians 5:7
 

Mon Jul 17 3:03 pm  #702


Re: A gay ex-husband answers your questions

Rob wrote:

ellexoh,

We are not really alone. 
a kind virtual hug

 

Virtual hug accepted with thanks  It hurts that the only people who know my life is 
crumbling....is the counselor and a group of wonderful peer-supporters....on the other side of the world!
 


*....*
 

Mon Jul 17 3:27 pm  #703


Re: A gay ex-husband answers your questions

We may be on the other side of the world but we are still here and on your side with support and understanding of people that have or are going through what you are.
My wife in the middle of our marriage counseling just came out and said. I feel like all this counseling is trying to help me not be gay. Which killed our counseling right there on the spot with our counselor saying I can't help you.

Last edited by Demons-halo (Mon Jul 17 3:28 pm)

 

Mon Jul 17 3:35 pm  #704


Re: A gay ex-husband answers your questions

Demons-halo wrote:

 

I feel my partner thinks the counseling is me wanting him to 'not' be bisexual, 
when all it is...is a process of understanding on my part that will hopefully lead 
me to a definite decision on where it's best for me to be. 
His refusing to go to the appointment today feels like a milestone-choice from him
 


*....*
 

Tue Jul 18 4:49 am  #705


Re: A gay ex-husband answers your questions

Well you can ask Sean if couples counseling helped him...or individual counseling of himself or then wife...

I was going to counseling for me..my ex did not want the marriage and would not go to any counseling.

My therapist's statement when I first found out...I "would be supported whatever I chose...your wife is gay. .do you really think you can fix that"?

Seems standard..these spouses are fine and we are all in therapy.  They say you can spot a narcissist by the path of destruction they leave around them...


"For we walk by faith, not by sight .."  2Corinthians 5:7
 

Tue Jul 18 10:04 am  #706


Re: A gay ex-husband answers your questions

Sean, thanks for being here and being a voice in the wilderness.  You have changed lives, to be sure.

I wish you all the best.  Stop by now and again to say hi.  You're family.

Kel


You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.
 

Mon Jul 24 3:28 pm  #707


Re: A gay ex-husband answers your questions

Posted a note in the first post.  

**Note from admin**    Sean has elected to "retire" from duty as of July 2017 to focus more time on his children and his own personal needs.  Anyone is welcome to post a reply at the end of the thread, but don't expect Sean to reply. I will leave this thread open for people to read and post as it has a WEALTH of valueble insight and advice that we can all benefit from. We thank him for his time and care and hope that someday he will return to continue efforts to help the str8 spouse communitiy. 


-Formerly "Lostdad" - I now embrace the username "phoenix" because my former life ended in flames, but my new life will be spectacular. 

 
 

Thu Aug 3 5:34 am  #708


Re: A gay ex-husband answers your questions

Good day forum! I apologize for not posting sooner but my former login (Séan) wasn't working; hence this new username and account. Thank you everyone for your kind messages. I've learned so much from this forum and from my exchanges with all of you. I do intend to check back in from time to time, but perhaps not as regularly (or perhaps as obsessively) as before. I hope you are all doing well.  

 

Thu Aug 3 3:25 pm  #709


Re: A gay ex-husband answers your questions

Hi Sean

nice to see you here again.  

all the best, Lily

 

Thu Aug 3 3:28 pm  #710


Re: A gay ex-husband answers your questions

Hi Sean,

How's things going with the kiddos?

Kel


You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.
 

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