OurPath Open Forum
This forum is for discussion of issues related to Mixed Orientation relationships only, that is when one partner is heterosexual (straight) and one is Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender or Questioning.
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1 of 1- Roo
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Is this a normal feeling
I hate this subject but is it normal to pray for death? Not that I want to, but this pain is getting almost unbearable. I can't stop thinking about how unfair all of this is.
“And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain, when you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.” ~ Haruki Murakami ~
- Count of Monte Cristo
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Re: Is this a normal feeling
I hope you aren't hitting that low! There are emergency crisis lines out there. Call a good family member or friend.
- Count of Monte Cristo
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Re: Is this a normal feeling
Honestly. If things are that bad you can call me. In bc canada. 7 weeks post d-day. Surviving day by day here.
- Roo
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Re: Is this a normal feeling
It's not something that I would do. I'm just so afraid of my future.
“And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain, when you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.” ~ Haruki Murakami ~
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Thread Starter- Rob
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Re: Is this a normal feeling
Roo,
First definitely call your local suicide help line if you're feeling really down. I called when my GX was out cheating and I was shaking uncontrollably with the trauma of it. The person was kind and empathic which is sometimes all we need.
Yes it is normal. My situation got so bad that I feared my GX more than death. I longed for a better place. And our love for our spouses sadly is strong even if they are hurting us.
But these gay disloyal spouses are not worth leaving this world just yet. In my case I have kids which get my strong real love now. And I can see now that even without kids I/we deserve so much better.
Hang in there..there is an end to the pain..you do not need to leave this world to relieve the pain. And these spouses are so not worth it.
A kind big e-hug. (Virtual but authentic)
"For we walk by faith, not by sight .." 2Corinthians 5:7