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Thu Oct 12 9:23 am  #81

Re: Really Starting to Wonder.....

Thank you all for your responses.  Out of His Closet - as I said in my post, my husband was bi-polar (they said slightly, whatever that means) but also he was having the delusions.  Interesting that your father and my husband had same symptoms.  In my search of what causes delusions I came across a couple of times that being GID can cause delusions (many other things can too).  It was something that Freud came up with and many disputed it, but it is still interesting that it is a possibility.  

Kel - In the note he left he did say he thought we'd be better off without him and also he said he wanted his kids to remember him how he was.  All things you are saying above.  I don't think I'll ever think this was the right decision, but we can't change it so I have to hope that some part of that is true. 

My girls are doing ok.  (I worry at times too well....), but we just take it one day at a time and try to find things to be happy about.  We got two puppies (yes, two and yes, its a bit crazy), but they are good therapy for us.  We're at the beach right now for our fall break with my sister and her kids and have planned a trip to Hawaii for Christmas.  All good things that are getting us through.  I still have been getting on this site and reading things, because it continues to provide answers to the things that were going on with my husband.  I am so happy I found this group and appreciate all of you.  I'm sure I'll still be around as I like to keep up with you guys and hear your stories.  


Thu Oct 12 10:26 am  #82

Re: Really Starting to Wonder.....


I'm so sorry to hear this news.  As much as the actions of our spouses hurt us, we don't want them to take their own lives.  How awful for you.  Mostly though, I know as parents we all want what's best for our kids.. and losing a parent is horrific for the kids. 

It sounds like you are doing well considering.  

Congrats on the puppies.. I think it's a wonderful idea.  Take those vacations, find peace and happiness and healing.  

Hope to see more posts from you in the future. 

-Formerly "Lostdad" - I now embrace the username "phoenix" because my former life ended in flames, but my new life will be spectacular. 


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